Your role as Parent

Mary Lynne — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 14:14:51 +0000

Parents take on many roles throughout the various stages of childhood: Teacher, Administrator, and now, I’m adding a 3rd role- Coach!

Teacher

Ages 0-6

Parents spend hours doing day-to-day activities

Administrator

Ages 7-12

Kids are more independent and social

Parents support their child in this stage without giving up their role as teacher

Some refer this stage as “taxi driver” – parents provide transportation, help organize events, manage their child’s schedule, and support them while they explore their interests

Coach *New Role*

Ages 13-20

Kids begin to manage their own schedules

Kids begin to make personal decisions

Parents, sometimes, lose their role as teacher/administrator and are confused on what their role is – they start taking on various characteristics, such as: nagging to get homework done and to pick up clothing, frustrated at the silent treatment, etc.

THIS IS WHERE THE CHANGE HAPPENS = Your New Role is now COACH!

Parents support their teenager to strive for a full life – now and after they have left the nest

Your role as parent is going to encompass COACH in the title

DEFINITION OF COACH: One who helps another to explore his or her potential and support them in moving on to bigger and better things.

GOALS FOR TEENAGERS: to know that they matter, to respect and appreciate themselves and others around them, to want to extend themselves in a compassionate way to others, to be a part of society, to embrace challenges in life, and to learn how to listen to others.

WHO DOESN’T WANT THAT FOR THEIR CHILD?

Becoming a Parent Coach

Mary Lynne — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 13:47:04 +0000

Becoming a Coach to your child

When you decide to become a coach to your teenager, things will change for the better.

Three things are important in becoming a parent-coach:

1. Know yourself

2. Practice the qualities of a coach on a daily basis

3. Be there.

1st = KNOW YOURSELF

Take time to examine your own life first

Walk the talk.

2nd = QUALITIES OF A COACH

Set STANDARDS that define your expectations

Do your standards meet your expectations?

Be FLEXIBLE and creative on how you uphold those standards

“Go with the Flow” teenagers change on a daily basis and you need to be ready for anything!

Have PATIENCE and remember the big picture

Have patience with yourself through this process and with those around you.

Be CONSISTENT on all levels

Are your actions and words consistent?

Are you available on a consistent basis?

3rd = BE THERE

Teenagers need more parent time, NOT less

Teens need to know that parents are home and that they are there for them.

Tools 4 Teens » Mary Lynne

Your role as Parent

Becoming a Parent Coach